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  “We stopped by the house of Michael’s friend.”

  “Who?” His eyes narrowed.

  “Paul Miller. He’s a friend Michael knows from college.” I sighed heavily. “I’m trying to be patient with you, Daniel. There was no reason for all this commotion.” I took a sip of my tea. “I’m tired. We can talk about this later.” I picked up my untouched plate. “You’d better be going.” I marched into the kitchen and raked my plate into the slop bucket.

  Daniel followed me. I drank the rest of the tea and set the glass on the counter.

  “I think I’ll spend the night in the shop. . .if that’s okay.”

  Someone knocked at the back door. Before I had a chance to respond, Daniel strode over and yanked it open.

  “What do you want?” he said, his voice gruff, blocking the door so I couldn’t see.

  “Who is it?” I asked.

  “Michael. Who do you think?”

  Michael tried to push by Daniel, but Daniel put out an arm.

  “Please, Dan. I need to talk to Jay.”

  Daniel shook his head. “You need to leave. Now.”

  I pushed Daniel back. “Let him in! Come in, Michael.” I ignored Daniel’s angry look. “What’s wrong?”

  Michael didn’t answer. He paced around the kitchen while Daniel and I watched. He paused and raked his fingers through his hair, his eyes glistening in the light.

  Fear choked me. I took Daniel’s hand in mine without thinking, and his fingers linked with mine.

  “Michael. . .” My voice was barely a whisper. I cleared my throat and tried again. “Michael, you’re scaring me. What’s wrong?”

  “It’s Chance.” His liquid dark eyes found and held mine.

  My hands trembled, and Daniel tightened his grip. “Where is he? What’s wrong?”

  Michael bowed his head. “He’s dead.”

  Chapter 36—Another Loss

  I stared at him. “Dead? He was fine just a few minutes ago.”

  “One of the people leaving must have run over him,” Michael said.

  I clung to Daniel, my legs like jelly.

  Michael raised his head. A muscle quivered in his jaw. “I’m sorry, Jay.”

  “Where is he?” I asked.

  “I left him outside the backdoor.”

  I went out and pulled the string to turn the porch light on. My hand shook, sending the bulb swinging. Rays of light shivered across the ground.

  Chance lay on an old cloth as if he simply slept. I fell to my knees.

  I ran my hand over the silky fur, but Chance didn’t move. I checked for a pulse, but there was none. I pulled back an eyelid, but no life danced in his unfocused eyes.

  Tears streamed down my face. Falling onto the lifeless form, I rocked back and forth on my knees. A hand lifted me.

  Daniel’s. He wrapped me in his arms, and my tears wet his shoulder.

  Michael stood close by, watching us. I pulled away from Daniel and found my handkerchief. I wiped away the tears and turned to face Michael.

  “Did you see what happened?”

  Michael shook his head. “I was talking to the preacher. Well, to tell the truth, he was giving me a talking to. He was pretty mad.” He swallowed. “And everyone else had already left. When the preacher finally said goodnight, I went to my truck. About twenty feet away, I saw him.” Michael’s eyes glistened in the light from the bare bulb.

  I knelt again by the body and felt the broken bones beneath my fingers. He must have died quickly, and, for that, I was grateful.

  I stood and clung once again to Daniel.

  “Would you like for me to bury him?” Michael asked.

  “I can do it,” Daniel said.

  I sighed heavily. “Both of you can.”

  “I’ll get the shovels.” Michael headed to the barn, his gait still unsteady.

  “Daniel. . .” I tilted my head up. “I didn’t tell you that Michael’s been drinking.”

  “You didn’t have to tell me. I know.”

  “Oh.” That was one of the reasons why he was so angry. “I don’t think he should be driving. See if you can get him to stay tonight.”

  “Jay, are you kidding? Let him go!”

  “Daniel, could you forgive yourself if something happened to him?”

  He didn’t speak for a second. He nodded and sighed. “Reckon you’re right.”

  I couldn’t bear to see Chance lowered into the ground. “I’m going in. I can’t. . .” Through my tears, I stood on tiptoes to kiss his cheek.

  Daniel hugged me and kissed my forehead. “You need to get inside anyway. It’s getting chilly.” He looked over my head, and I knew he was watching Michael. “If he gets out of line, I’m going to deck him,” he said into my ear.

  “Daniel! Please be nice?” I swiped at my tears.

  “I’m sorry.” But he didn’t sound like it.

  Michael stood at the bottom of the steps with two shovels.

  “Where do you want us to bury him?” he asked quietly.

  “Under the cedar tree. I’m sure Aunt Liza won’t mind.”

  I knelt again to run my hand over Chance’s beautiful face before I wrapped him in the cloth. This time Michael placed his hand under my elbow to help me to my feet.

  “I’ll see y’all in the morning.” I went in without waiting for an answer.

  The coffee cup I had used that morning still sat on the counter along with other dirty dishes. Poor Aunt Liza! She had been so worried that she hadn’t bothered cleaning the kitchen. How could Uncle Howard do this to her? To add to her troubles, I had worried her so without meaning to.

  I idly twirled the cup around in my hands, looking at the dried grounds. Just grounds. How could Paul’ granny see anything in them? I saw nothing.

  I took my cup to the sink and filled the pan with soapy water and began to wash the dishes.

  Poppa, Zeke, now Chance. I couldn’t bear any more loss. I bent my head over the pan and wept, my tears splashing into the water.

  A knock sounded softly on the backdoor. I tried to speak, to call ‘come in,’ but words would not come. I heard the sound of the door opening.

  “Jay?” Michael whispered.

  I kept my head bent over the sink, willing him to leave. His footsteps crossed the floor until I felt him behind me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck. Shivers ran down my spine.

  I turned and moved away from him, breathing quickly. We faced each other, and he closed the distance between us, and pulled me into his arms. His mouth found mine.

  I was the first to pull away, although I still clung to his shirt sleeve, breathing heavily.

  He tilted my chin and looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

  I searched his eyes, seeing only tenderness. I released my grip on his shirt and stepped back. “It’s okay.” My hands shook as I pushed back my hair.

  “Jay. . .”

  I shook my head. “I can’t . . .Daniel. . .” I took a shaky breath.

  We stood for a few minutes in silence. Finally, Michael cleared his throat. “I actually came in to get a quilt. It’s turned a lot cooler.”

  “Oh. I’ll be right back.”

  I walked, my gait almost as unsteady as Michael’s had been, to the chifferobe in Zeke’s old room. I opened the door and picked up a quilt and gasped.

  Under the quilt lay a gin bottle, still half full.

  I stared at it for a few seconds and left it, closing the chifferobe door, unsure what to do. Did Uncle Howard have alcohol hidden all over the house?

  I returned to the kitchen and handed the quilt to Michael. “Do you need anything else?”

  He caught my arm. “You. I need you.”

  I pulled away and held up a hand. “Don’t. . .I’m with Daniel.”

  He surveyed me sadly.

  I moved another step back. “Goodnight.”

  He didn’t answer but simply slipped out the door I held open. I closed the wooden door firmly behind him and locked it.
I stumbled to my bedroom and fell on my bed.

  Images of Chances broken body, Michael’s kiss, and Daniel’s anger rushed through my mind.

  I touched my lips that still tingled from the kiss.

  Had Daniel seen? Should I tell him? He would kill Michael. . .No, I couldn’t tell him. Daniel had been so kind to me. But was that enough? I rolled my head back and forth. What was I going to do?

  I simply didn’t know.

  Chapter 37—Not Knowing

  The next morning, groggy from lack of sleep, I looked around the kitchen. I knew I had placed the note on the table, under the sugar bowl. The bowl was moved out of its regular place in the center of the table. Did Aunt Liza move the bowl without seeing the note? That would be unusual. But she was so worried about Uncle Howard, she could have been distracted.

  I looked on the floor, finally getting down on my hands and knees to peer under the stove and the dry sink. There was the note, wedged near the leg of the sink. I picked it up and smoothed it out, placing it under the sugar bowl.

  Aunt Liza was still asleep. I didn’t awaken her. Instead, I started breakfast, cooking bacon, eggs, and grits. I also made a baker of biscuits.

  I went out to Uncle Howard’s shop and knocked on the door. Michael opened the door, holding the quilt.

  I took the quilt from his hands. “I fixed breakfast for you and Dan.”

  “Okay.”

  “Let Daniel know?”

  “Sure.”

  I went in and put the quilt away before I sank into a chair at the table. What was I doing inviting him into the house after last night? But, he had to eat, didn’t he?

  I went to Aunt Liza’s bedroom and knocked on the door. She didn’t answer, so I cracked the door and peeked in. She lay on her back, her mouth open, snoring softly. I walked to her bed and shook her shoulder. She opened her eyes a crack.

  “Aunt Liza, I cooked breakfast and Michael and Daniel are here.”

  “Michael and Daniel?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” I sat down on the edge of her bed and told her about Chance.

  She sat up and placed a hand on my arm. “Poor Chance! I’m so sorry, Jay.”

  Tears stung my eyes, but I blinked them away.

  I stood and managed a weak smile. “Oh. And I found the note. It was under the dry sink.”

  “You didn’t have to look for it. I believed you, honey.”

  “Anyway, I’ve got breakfast done. You need to hurry before the biscuits get cold.”

  I went back to the kitchen, and Michael and Daniel were at the screen door, and I motioned them in.

  “Aunt Liza will be here in a minute. Would y’all like a cup of coffee?”

  “Sure,” Daniel said, following me to the stove.

  Michael simply nodded and moved to the table without looking at me.

  I poured each a cup and placed the creamer and sugar in front of Michael.

  “Thanks for the milk and sugar, but I drink it black now.” He looked down into his cup, avoiding my eyes, I thought.

  I sat down across from him. Daniel took a seat next to me.

  Daniel took a sip of coffee, watching me. Finally he spoke. “Feeling better, Jay?”

  I simply nodded. Aunt Liza came in and joined us.

  She nodded at Michael. “Will you bless our food for us?”

  I caught my breath. Why hadn’t she asked Daniel? After what Michael had told me yesterday, about no longer believing in God, I was unsure of what he would do.

  He hesitated for only a second before bowing his head. “Dear God, Thank you for this food. Bless the hands that prepared it. Amen.”

  Short, but he had prayed. I passed the biscuits to Aunt Liza, but she waved them away. “I’m not hungry. I’ll just have coffee.” She didn’t say anything else, did not even try to make small talk with Michael or Daniel.

  I put my hand on hers. “Do you want to go talk to Uncle Howard?”

  She shook her head, her eyes on the coffee cup.

  “I could go with you if you want me to. . .”

  Her head flew up. “No. It won’t do any good.”

  “You never know unless you try.”

  She leveled her gaze at me. “Please, Jay. Let’s not talk about it.”

  I pushed the eggs around my plate. “If you really love someone, you can’t just give up.” I glanced up and saw Michael watching me intently. Warmth flooded my face.

  Aunt Liza sighed. “It’s not that easy.”

  I opened my mouth to answer, but Daniel made a slight shake of his head at me, and I fell silent. Now wasn’t the time to talk about this. And, Aunt Liza was right. It wasn’t easy.

  Michael buttered his third biscuit. Maybe he was trying not to hurt my feelings. Daniel was still working on his first one.

  I glanced at the clock. “It’s getting late. I’m going to be late for the bus.”

  “I’ll take you,” Michael said.

  I had forgotten for a moment that I attended college with Michael.

  Daniel pushed his chair back. “No. I’ll take her.”

  “You’re not going down home?” I asked.

  “No, I decided to stick around here.”

  Michael was on his feet moving toward the door. “Thanks for breakfast, Jay. Mrs. Barnett, I’m sorry about yesterday.”

  She waved a hand in his direction. “I know it was just a misunderstanding.”

  I started to clear the table, but she stopped me. “Go before you’re late. I’ll clean up.”

  “If you’re sure. . .” I dropped a kiss on her bent head. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” I hated leaving her alone, but I didn’t need to fall behind in my classes.

  We left Aunt Liza looking into her coffee cup as intently as Paul’s granny had done.

  Could Aunt Liza see what her own future held? I couldn’t. I didn’t know what we were going to do.

  Daniel drove me to school, and neither of us spoke. He parked the car, and I opened the door.

  “I’ll walk you to your class,” he said.

  “That’s okay. You don’t have to.”

  “But I want to.” He took my books from my hands and grinned. “I’ll even carry your books for you.”

  “Thanks.”

  When we arrived at my class, I reached for my books. His hand closed on mine, and his fingers wrapped around mine.

  “Jay. . .”

  “Yes?” I looked at our hands intertwined before looking into his eyes.

  “Never mind.” He gave me a peck on the cheek, released my hand, and strode away.

  A group of girls giggled, and I glanced at them. Another group just like Sylvia and her friends. People like that were everywhere.

  One girl moved away from the group toward me. “Is that your boyfriend?”

  “Yes,” I said. “Yes, he is.” I raised my chin a little higher as I walked to my desk.

  Chapter 38—Knowing

  I could barely listen in my classes. I was eager to get back to Aunt Liza. I felt uneasy leaving her alone all day. Finally, my last class, biology, ended.

  Michael hovered by the classroom door. “Hey, Jay.”

  “Hey.” I shifted my books from one arm to another.

  “Let me take you home.”

  After that kiss, I didn’t want to be alone with him. “Michael, that’s not a good idea.” I tried to move away, but he stopped me.

  “I need to talk to you.”

  “Why?”

  “There’s something you need to know.”

  “Tell me here.”

  He glanced around. “No. There are too many people around.”

  “Haven’t we said all we need to say?”

  “It’s not that.” His eyes filled with sorrow.

  I hesitated, but the look in his eyes finally convinced me. He reached for my books, and I allowed him to take them from my grasp. He reached to take my hand, and the same group of girls passed me, giggling loudly. I ignored them but pulled my hand away and stepped back.

  “All ri
ght. We’ll talk. Just talk.”

  But, once in the truck, he still didn’t speak. Once or twice he glanced my way, yet, he remained silent.

  I, too, kept silent. What could I say?

  When we pulled into the yard, Daniel’s car was parked there.

  My eyes widened. I had forgotten he hadn’t returned to camp. He would explode if he saw me with Michael again. “Michael, just go.” I jumped from the truck and ran up the porch.

  Marla met me at the door.

  “Marla! What are you doing here?”

  “I heard about Chance. I wanted to be sure you’re okay.” She looked at me solicitously before glancing beyond me. “Hi, Michael.”

  I gritted my teeth. Why had he followed me?

  Michael, unshaven, clothes rumpled, ran his fingers through his hair. “Hey.” He looked embarrassed. “Umm...sorry to hear about you and Andrew.”

  Her eyes swept over Michael, taking in his disheveled appearance, I was sure.

  They exchanged a look of commiseration. Marla grimaced. “What a pair! Andrew and Sylvia.”

  Michael laughed harshly. “Yeah, quite a pair.” He raked his fingers through his hair again. “Where’s Dan?”

  “He’s tending to the horses,” Marla said.

  “Uh. . .okay. I’ll go see if I can help him.”

  He left, and Marla raised an eyebrow. I shook my head.

  “Nothing is going on between us. Don’t look at me like that.”

  Her eyes filled with compassion. “Poor, Jay!”

  I managed a smile. “Poor, Marla!” I was teasing but was distressed to see tears fill her eyes. “Marla, I’m sorry! I didn’t know you cared so much for Andrew.”

  She blinked the tears away. “I don’t. It’s not that.” She managed to smile. “Anyway, I knew you and your aunt were going through so much, so I brought supper over. Daniel was kind enough to give me a ride.”

  “Oh, you didn’t have to do that! But thank you.” I gave her a hug. “Where’s Aunt Liza?”

  “She’s lying down.” She placed a hand on my arm. “Jay, I’m worried about her.”

  “You and me both.”

  “If there’s anything I can do, let me know. I’ll see you later.”She started toward the door.